Football's Potential Apps

South American Guide to Manchester


Who better to give an insight into the life of a Manchester home-owner in the ermmm..beeeaaaautiful? footballing city, than two men who live ( or rather have lived) there for a combined 5 years? None other than AC Milan's Robinho and Carlos Tevez ( whereabouts unknown).

Mario Makes Your Choice with Mario Balotelli

Tired of your daily routine? The 9 to 5 iver? The School Run? Rush Hour on the M40? Then all over again. Worry no more, WAM? Ltd have developed an app that lets none other than the articulate and selfless Mario Balotelli make those decisions for you.

Example:

" What should I put for packed lunch tomorrow?"
Mario : " Caviar and crushed diamonds"

" What should I spend my bonus on?"
Mario : " Hand it over to the local street vagrant"

" Should I dump my girlfriend, while she's being interviewed on national television, by text?"
Mario : " Yes you should"

iKen speak Daglish


" Mumble....Luis Suarez......mumble mumble......the boy's got potential.....mumble........only £35 million.......mumble......Stevie G"

Ever wondered what ' King' Kenny is actually saying?  The Liverpool squad have certainly been affected by his low pitched team selections, they obviously can't understand what he is saying if Jordan Henderson starts each game and Jay Spearing gets a first team place as well. Well wonder no more, the team, tired of his murmuring in his half time team talks and pre match squad listing, have created an app that lets the user amplify Kenny's voice whenever he's doing a TV interview.

Note: Charlie Adam was unavailable to aid the players in development, he's still looking for that ball.

Monitor your Heart Rate with Arsene Wenger

Think you're the only one that can get angry? Enter Arsene Wenger. After 16 years of painfully obvious fouls, offsides and penalties not being given, 'The Boss' has constructed an app to measure your heart rate in terms of football events.

Example:

" Away day at the Britannia"

" Last minute penalty not given to Arsenal"

" Last minute penalty given against Arsenal"

" Didier Drogba tumbling over to a Denilson challenge"

" Blatant handball at Old Trafford"

" Letting a 2 goal lead slip at the hands of your fierce rivals"

" Letting a 4 goal lead slip at the hands of Newcastle"

Messi Tracking System

The Arsenal team could have really used this last year. If you're a player about to go toe to toe with the Argentine Maestro, you can't step onto the pitch without this application. Follow the runs and shut out the magician, well try.

For an additional £1, add Iniesta and Pedro to the tracked wizards list.

UEFA Champions League Team of the Year 2011/2012

GK: Petr Cech

Along with luck, Cech has been Chelsea's star player in an otherwise abysmal squad. Neuer is a very close second, but he is playing with great players, unlike Cech.

Kept out 10 shots by the Barca team, and was saved by the woodwork twice.

RB: Philip Lahm

Best RB in the world. I was blind in thinking Sagna was better than this player. Dangerous in attack, as well as defence, leader, and is the most consistent player in their team.

Made 46 tackles and 38 interceptions, and only committed 4 fouls.

LB: Ashley Cole

Chelsea's second goalkeeper. Napoli, Barcelona. Most consistent performer in their team.

Made 35 tackles and 18 interceptions in his 11 games in the UCL for Chelsea, and also contributed 2 assists

CB: Alessandro Nesta

May be past it, but he still knows a thing or two. Applying show stopping tackles in both of his encounters with Messi & Co, he was an inspiration to the team.

Made 6 interceptions and 5 tackles in both of his fine performances against the Catalan giants.

CB: Paulo Jorge

You do not know this man. Long story short, the player who won APOEL Nicosia the game against French giants, Lyon, a result that will be forever written in the history books of the minnows from Cyprus. His courageous defensive performance against the European powerhouse makes this position his own.

Vs Lyon. 3 interceptions, 11 clearances, 7 being effective, 3 shots blocked, 1 offside won, not a booking to his name.

CDM: Xabi Alonso

He has proved to be the Best Holding Midfielder in the world this season. With stellar performances against every team Real Madrid have come up against. Real Madrid's regista.

701 successful passes/787 attempted passes - 89.1% pass accuracy

CM: Franck Ribery

Has been Bayern's best player all season, marginally overtaking Toni Kroos. Dismantled Mansour City's defence in the group stages and led the German side to the final.

Only Messi has attempted more dribbles than him. Messi = 44, Ribery = 39

CM: Mesut Ozil

Words alone cannot describe the intelligence of this man. The maestro of this powerful Madrid side that has been unstoppable this season.

He made a total of 31 key passes in the competition, averaging 3.1 KP per game. The second highest in the competition.

RW: Lionel Messi

Best player in the history of the beautiful game. Simples.

32 KP, 890 passes, 44 dribbles, 5 assists and 14 goals. All done within 10 games.

LW: Cristiano Ronaldo

Can't have one without the other. But seriously...

10 goals, 3 assists. Just another year for Ronnie.

ST: Didier Drogba

Mario Gomez and Karim Benzema both had good reason to be selected for this team. But none have done what Drogba has done for this Chelsea team. Opening goal versus Napoli to kick-start their comeback. Winner versus Barcelona. Equaliser against Munich in the final. Chelsea hero.

7 games, 6 goals. European defenders can breath a sigh of relief now that Drogba is going to leave Chelsea.

Who should Arsenal sign to challenge for the title?

The Shortlist:

Marvin Martin - Sochaux

Eden Hazard - LOSC Lille

Mamadou Sakho - Paris Saint Germain

Gary Cahill - Bolton Wanderers

Marvin Martin

In his new contract at Sochaux, there states a 'End of Season Get Out Clause' which means that there has been a mutual agreement by Marvin and his club, Sochaux, of him leaving at the end of the 2011/12 season. This is the opportunity Arsenal should grab with both hands. This player might be relatively unknown to many of you, but last season he finished as Ligue 1's top creator as he provided 17 assists for his team mates, and on his debut for the French national team, he came on with 15 minutes left on the clock and left with a spectacular brace of goals and an assist. This proves that he can perform on the big stage. He is the real replacement for Fabregas.

Eden Hazard

At a tender age of 20, Eden Hazard has made 22 appearances for the Belgian National Team, won Ligue 1 Player of the Year after winning the Young Player of the Year Award twice in a row before that. The France legend, Zinedine Zidane proclaimed that 'Hazard will be a major star'. I can tell you now that Eden will not only replace Nasri, but will eclipse him from our memories. If I was Arsene Wenger, I would do whatever it takes to sign this player.

Mamadou Sakho

I can say without a doubt in my mind that wherever Sakho goes on from now it will only be upwards. A big transfer to a big club, European glory and captaincy for the French National Team, that is what he was destined to do. He will achieve all of those goals if Arsene Wenger pays up. A physical presence, mobile and aerially dominant, this ticks all the boxes that Arsenal need in defence. He is the same player that Sol Campbell was in his prime at Arsenal. He will be a boulder in our defence for years to come if he signs for us.

Gary Cahill

The last player that we need to sign is the most obvious of the four: Gary Cahill. Arsenal have been heavily linked with this player and the Arsenal faithful are are crying out for him. Recently breaking into the England squad as a regular alongside John Terry and is the backbone of the Bolton team. He is aerially dominant, fast and strong, he is also prone to single handedly holding a whole team at bay, as he did last year at Old Trafford against Manchester United, Man U won the game 1-0, but it would have been a lot more without Gary Cahill at the back. As well as being excellent defensively, he can score as well, netting for England and Bolton this season. With only 6 months left in his contract in January and with no intention of signing a new one, Bolton have no choice but to let him go at a cut price from his supposed £17,000,000 price tag, or rather risk him moving on in the summer on a free. But Arsenal must act quickly as Tottenham, Chelsea and Manchester City are all after him as well.

Who do you think your team should sign and sell?

Enough about Arsenal, I want you to comment on who your team should sign and let go of. As a Manchester United fan, would you sign Sneijder and drop Darren Fletcher, as a Chelsea fan would you nab Neymar and banish Bosingwa, or as a Tottenham fan would you like to land Leandro (Damiao) and sell Sebastien (Bassong)? Post your comments.

Welcome to my blog

Welcome to my blog, the first of many as you will find out. Just some info about myself.
Name: Ayo Odimayo
Age:14
Club Supporting:Arsenal
In my blog I will not only focus on Arsenal news, but on other Football news around the world. As we all know there are many football stories in the news now and inevitably in the future, so it looks like I will be very busy in my time here.